The tales of the warrior and the “idiot”

Sunday 31st August, 2008 | Skip to comments (27)

Griffin vs cge

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, where magical phenomena such as low priced flat pack furniture, luxurious meatballs and faster than light internet connections existed, the dancing queens wandered throughout the kingdom bringing peace and harmony to all those who were lucky enough to inhabit these miraculous lands. It was not long however, before an evil foreigner who went by the name of ParadokS, had invaded this mysterious place, casting a dark shadow over the land.

Chaos and mayhem spread everywhere. “Who will dare stand up to this wicked creature?” asked the poor and the innocent. But these were hard times as their last leader, King Sassa of the Suger Valleys, had become weak and eventually had to give up the thrown, leaving the people leaderless and divided. Long continuous debates and pointless political struggles took place, but led nowhere. As a last resort, a desperate cry for help was sent throughout the globe.

Fortunately, this distress call found its way to a savior. This messiah was none other than Saint Philip, a notorious proponent who was living in the land of the free. Philip was raised upon high values of independence, freedom and unhealthy food. When Philip heard the liberty of the muscular blond haired wonderland was at stake, he immediately took charge. Philip announced that a duel tournament must be held in order to decide the fate of the land. According to him: “The tournament will consist of eight deathmatch rounds, all of which will be held within the boundaries of The Dark Zone. The last man standing shall be declared the undisputed king and ruler of all grounds.”

Great warriors all over the country stepped up for the challenge, but failed measurably as they were no match for the malicious ParadokS. Eventually it all came down to one of two men. The first was the legendary bonde champion, also known as the Mighty Griffin, who has made it all the way from the woods of wilderness. Griffin had years of excessive training behind him and was the only warrior ever to possess the sixth sense - ‘bondeskill’. His current fighting shape however, was at question. Against him stood Cage, an urban fighter arriving from much more civilized districts, yet he was mysterious and unknown to the wide public. Cage represented a new and younger generation of duelers. His combat methods were based on a more modern, patient and tactical warfare, also known to others as the nerve-racking art of Counter-Strike.

Cage and Griffin had to face each other first, as only one of them could be given a chance to go up against the despicable ParadokS and save the kingdom from eternal doom. Thousands of anxious witnesses from all around the world gathered to behold this final test. It was then that the unexpected of all has happened. The mythical Griffin refused to compete with Cage and retired from the tournament. It is unnecessary to say, that a deep feeling of disappointment filled the hearts of the raging masses as they were looking for blood.

Griffin was short with his words and explained that he does not battle “idiots” and “lame” beings such as cage. When asked for clarification about these rather bold statements, Griffin was once again brief: “I thought everybody knew he is” (an idiot). Griffin added later on that there are “various reasons” for his usage of such outrageous derogatory names which are “too numerous to bring up”, as a little smile appeared on his face.

Cage on the other hand, claimed that he had no prior contact with Griffin whatsoever, with the exception of a few friendly duel and tag team matches that were held a few years before. Cage suggested however, that Griffin might not be so fond of his techniques, which as mentioned above, revolve around the irritating arts of the Counter-Strikers union.

Was Griffin afraid of Cage? In what ways were Griffin and Cage involved before this tournament? Did Cage molest Stewie and bring shame to the house of the Griffins? Could Cage successfully use his GL camp strategies against Griffin? Who would be victorious if the match was held? Will Griffin ever compete in an official tournament again?

Unfortunately, all these questions and more will remain a mystery to us all.

27 responses to “The tales of the warrior and the “idiot””

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RocketZ
Sunday 31st August, 2008

Damn, i was looking forward to some real facts and drama.. not a tale :(

GODIS!
Sunday 31st August, 2008

LOL :)

OK98
Sunday 31st August, 2008

nice 1

jogi
Sunday 31st August, 2008

hey! who let the d&d fag out of the closet?

moris
Sunday 31st August, 2008

aaaaah, g'old lameness :)

Grump
Sunday 31st August, 2008

LOL, nice 1!

Guest
Sunday 31st August, 2008

Personally i think griffin is the one who is "lame" for chickening out from this game. I doubt he'd act the same if he had to fight some other lamer who is not as skilled as cage. If cage is such an idiot and lamer, better go and kick his ass than be a coward and quit. As the post says, griffin is afraid of cage's GL camping. Big disappoinment !

Vloody
Sunday 31st August, 2008

RocketZ, I think the article includes all the cold facts within itself. Griffin dropped out from the tourney while claiming cge is an idiot, and as he said, he doesn't play with idiots. Obviously cge has done something before that really upset griffin, but griffin chose to remain mysterious and keep it to himself. Even cge himself has no idea what he's done, which makes it all even weirder...

When i talked to griffin he said that they did talk/have some kind of interaction with each other before the tournament, that probably really pissed him off. Cage on the other hand claims the only time they "met" was back in 2005 when they played a few duels and 2on2s (demo links are included in the post).

deus
Monday 1st September, 2008

this is a little bit like the zidane-headbutt/red-card affair of '06. materazzi is cage ofc.

cge
Monday 1st September, 2008

Well seems a but weird, but if he had any problems he should have "atleast" dared to confront me on irc, i would understand if he didnt dare irl, but thats another issue..

embarrasing cowardless..

Hooraytio
Monday 1st September, 2008

"cowardless"

gg engrish!

ruskie
Monday 1st September, 2008

cu @ lan cge!

Jimo
Monday 1st September, 2008

2ez4cge?

BuurVrouw
Monday 1st September, 2008

What a lovely story. Makes all the drama so enjoyable even for someone like me who not follows all the duels and/or tournaments other then just the words written in the long dark hallways of irc.
I was the most impressed by the choice of changing words where they were phonetically outstandingly suitable (such like throne and wrecking), wich only added more to the pleasure for reading it, since I have the weird (nasty?) habit of doing that a lot myself.

Is it going to be continued?
When will be the next episode?
Can I be added to the mailinglist to notify me on new stories like this?

And is Guest just a silly nickname or an act of cowardness by someone who not dares to tell he wrote the story? Or maybe just a shy person?

BuurVrouw
Monday 1st September, 2008

And my compliments for the lot of work to fill in all the links with piccies.
Cool.

terrorhead
Tuesday 2nd September, 2008

Why would Griffin be so scared of cage? He won Qhlans in the past and is still an awesome player. Well I know why actually and I'll tell you why.

Cage stole Griffin's girlfriend. You read it here first.

ruskie
Tuesday 2nd September, 2008

woot, mrlame <3 cage? impossible!

roz
Tuesday 2nd September, 2008

I know who the guest writer is! :)

eizid
Tuesday 2nd September, 2008

The guest writer is Vloody, it's not a secret... I think.

Whimp
Thursday 4th September, 2008

Please note that it impossible to steal anyones girlfriend, unless they really want to be "stolen". :)

However, if that is the case and not some lame joke from terrorhead, I can understand Griffin..... Risking two defeats to the same person is just to much for any man....

Anyway, I hope David wins :)

bps
Friday 5th September, 2008

Whimp, you shouldn't believe in everything that's written :)

Hooraytio
Friday 5th September, 2008

so sad, griffins gf stolen :(

!phil
Friday 5th September, 2008

i lold.

did u lold?

Hooraytio
Friday 5th September, 2008

i caem

Vloody
Friday 5th September, 2008

Hooraytio :<

knast
Sunday 7th September, 2008

well we pld a mixed game on a server, cge joined with 3 other guys and said they wanna play a 4on4 on the server, he had admin rights and kicked/banned all for some minutes.

knast
Sunday 7th September, 2008

maybe its just a other nick of marvel (rofl:) :P
well i hope para will win the match! gl (but i think slackers dont need gl, they have the best luck ever)

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